What you might or might not know about your mom

Even though I can be an open book, I do have a few things you might not know about me. Not necessarily dirty little secrets - although I might have a few of those. And did I say I am not proud of those things?
As I was looking at the list of things Tooth of Teeth posted, it always makes you think. Gads, I have been walking this earth for 53 years. Where did that time go? But it has been a fun ride.
I wasn't always a 'focused' child. So all your travels and changes of heart probably came from me. I don't think I became comfortable in my own Kim-skin until later. But like I said it has been a fun ride.
Before I graduated from Fort Dodge, I wanted so much to go to an Art School or be an architect. You know my parents didn't take a keen interest in me going to any school but Iowa Central CC. Maybe it was because I didn't know what I wanted to do.
I hate to say this but the summer after I graduated I met your dad and for some odd reason, I gave up on my college dreams in a fashion. Sure, I did go onto Emporia State College in Kansas but why didn't I continue? Because I was in love I guess. Looking back it is pretty dumb. Mom & dad were more angry that I quit school (Metro Tech in Omaha for graphic design) after we were married than anything I ever did to them - and I did a lot. They even offered to pay. And I turned them down because I was all grown up (21) and I was married.
I have preached - get your degree - for this reason. I do regret never finishing my college degree. But I do know that if I would have gone onto school and not gotten married at that moment I would not have the three of you. You know life hands you certain things and you just go on and enjoy it. My dad lived his life in: coulda beens and shoulda beens. And I told myself I would never live my life that way. It was - I think - what made him an alcoholic.
I did not get my art degree but I have a beautiful yard that looks like an artists' palatte.
I did not get my architecture degree but I have designed a few houses.
I did not get a business degree (no, that was never on the radar) but I run a business.
So in a way, I am doing everything that I thought I had to have a degree to do.
That does not mean a degree has no value - it does.
I will continue my deep thoughts later.

Things to discuss...

What do you remember about Grandpa, Grandma?
What do you remember about (great) G'ma Minnie Cave?
What was your first job?
When was your first kiss? (Ewwww....)
Who was your first crush?
Your first boyfriend?
Who was the easiest to birth? (It's me, I know it.)
Family trips? (Ours, Navens...)
Stories from High School
University of Iowa
Neil Armstrong (Black and White Night?)
Park View
Dubuque
Building the House
Moving to Oklahoma
Moving to Shenandoah
Visits from family
Who's your REAL favorite kid. :)
Stories of us as kids, too- learning, doing stupid things, etc.


Just a starter list...

Worry

As a parent I have somehow gotten the 'worry' bug. And someone said the older your kids get? The more you worry. I laughed at that statement! What was worse than hearing your kids have a croup-like cough? What was worse than a fever that wouldn't break? What was worse than a overturned bike with scraped knees?
I now know...kids that are making their way in the world with all the adult responsibilities. Not only do I worry about my responsibilities...now my kids'!
Did I teach you to be good humans? Did I teach you how to separate whites from darks for the laundry? Did I teach you how to save? I think that would be a resounding 'no'! But more on saving later.
It is a morning that I am particularly 'worrying' for some reason. Call it a wake-up headache. Call it a impending doom. Call it being a mom.
Until I get off of this worry-thought I will end this conversation. Not a positive way to start the day...

It seems

It seems that time is traveling faster than I want. That looking back at the last 53 years of me walking on the face of the earth I have been in a haze. We talked about that in NYC. How I seem to remember broad strokes...or maybe moments...but names and dates sometimes escapes me. And that is why - I think - Allison wants to do this blog/journal.
You guys will always remember things differently than I do - through your eyes and your experiences. Why when you say something in your memory be it a good one or a bad one I might look at you with a blank stare. I didn't see your memory through your eyes.
So I will start this off by apologizing for whatever I did to screw you up. I never intended to make you unhappy and never intended to mess your life up. But sometimes I did. And sometimes I did not know that it hurt you. Ok, sometimes I did know...but had to get on with life.
But this blog will not be about vetting our sorrows towrds each other. I think what Allison wants is a rambling talk about memories. Maybe nuggets that will make us laugh or even cry. All good.
The one thing I do know...is that we have always been able to talk to each other. I am not going anywhere and will think of something to talk about in following blogs.
I would ask for suggestions, though. Things you would like me to share with you...g'ma/g'pa...familiy? growing up? what I wanted to be/do/become?
always with love...mom

Welcome to the blog

Hello mi familia. Use, share, and enjoy.

AJ